Insert foot
I almost feel like I have stuck my foot in my mouth. Like I said something that was misinterpreted not because people read it wrong but because I have a knack for communicating what I didnt think of first...
I know that we have all grown up and taken different paths. I of course miss the freedom of being a child/teen and having those uninhibited fun times and being stupid together. I didn't mean to solicite a girlfriends revival session, I was more making a statement that it would be fun to get together and see how we have each grown up and who we have become. reminise and laugh about it all.
R, our friendship was so important to me, I will never forget any of the times we shared either. We were so close for those few years and it just seemed to go away shortly after high school. Which is very understandable. You went one way I went the polar opposite. You are very right, I miss the you from back then. I dont know the you now. I am naturally curious about the you now and D and how you guys are and so on. Your blog feeds my curiousity, its nice to be able to read about you and know that your well.
Lu, I know that you and I were never close. I always considered you a friend, and like any of my friends would have done anything for you. I love reading your blogs and am as curious about your life as I am others. I admire that you are still who you have always been... Strong, independent and determined. I remember in high school when you decided to convert.. I remember my personal opinion and I remember admiring that you didnt seem to give a rip what others thought and you were going to do what you wanted to do because you believed in it. I HATED that you had the boy I had the secret crush on...lol. Oh High school I am glad its gone. So rock on Lu!!
Know it all, you meant the world to me. I always trusted you with everything I had. You were always there if/when I needed you. I remember all those nights staying with you while big Al was over seas or working nights. I always admired you.Thank you for being a part of my wedding and being a phone call away when I spit out an 8 pounder. I can say I am very proud of your determination and hard work at becoming an attorney.
I know I could never have the relationship with any of you that we once had. I wouldnt want to either. Im not that person anymore nor do I want to be. I know your all doing well in life and as always are strong.
posted by McRebeck @ 4:07 PM
2 Comments
2 Comments:
Wow. Thanks so much for the kind words. You know what, I think you worry too much! A trait you have always had. You didn't ask for too much.
I think that we are all at that age, the quarter-life crisis or whatever, and just afraid to commit to who we are...not wanting to be who we were.
It would be fun to see how we have all changed. Uninhibited good times shoudl not be contained to youth! I am so happy to hear you are doing well and are happy! It's okay to still be working at it and to be homesick. But homesick sometimes fosters an idealized memory of the way things were, or maybe even never were. I have fallen victim to this a million times. I imagine family and home as something it isn't, and never was. I just take it for what it is.
Anyway, keep bloggin. I love it!
I was hanging out with my teenage cousins one day, when all of a sudden I had an aching to be young again. No mortgage, no responsibilities--no yardwork! How nice would that be? Then it dawned on me, what an illusion. I wasn't free back then. There was nothing I was not able to do without my parents money or their permission. That's not freedom. Freedom is what I have now. And I think you are in the process of discovering that, too! We are strong, independent women that have the privelege of really being free. We can go anywhere, be anyone, and do anything we put our mind to. And I am so encouraged by that! The past serves as a reminder from where we have come, good and bad. But it is the future that will determine who we will become. It sounds like you are heading in the right direction.
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